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| Went to McDonald's for breakfast this morning. I usually get the same thing when I do go, and I seldom go, if at all. I've gone probably three times in the past 4 months. As I was eating, I was thinking about p90x. It's done. It's finished, for now.
I didn't complete all the workouts, and even within the workouts, I didn't do all of the exercises to its completion. But I've noticed a change for the better. I feel better. I feel...healthier. I can eat that McDonald's once in a while and not feel guilty. It's also a lesson to not take life for granted. Don't waste time sitting around. It's not just exercise so you can move around better and live longer. It's also eat well, but eat what you want once in a while. Another lesson is to rest. Take time off. I'm going to take the next month or so and rest. Overtraining is a drag, and I've felt it once or twice in the past couple of months. The fatigue enters. Tiredness abounds. Lassitude and listlessness persists. It's the body saying, "Rest!" And so I am.
And when I rest, I do not mean that I will not exercise at all. It's a different usage of the term rest. It's more like recovery. So the body is actually saying, "Let me Recover!"
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| I was playing pinochle yesterday with J and E and the whole time, I was thinking, "Settlers of Catan is so much better." I don't know why I like playing Settlers so much. Maybe it's the real-life take to the game, like how it's like dealing with people, dealing with their personalities, influencing, manipulating them, preparing for the future, or making an impact on something. Even though it may not be ethical, it's so much fun to be manipulative. And sometimes, when i'm not even trying to be manipulative and deceitful, it just flows out during the game out of control. So maybe the game helps me to get control of myself. Maybe it's because it helps bring to light parts of my personality (and others) into awareness.
I mentioned it helps to prepare for the future and to make an impact on something. The game is a lot like business. Resources are managed. There's five types: ore, grain, wood, brick, and sheep. Resources are exchanged. Players can boycott other players. Players can RESPECT others. Respect in our game is to remember that they are threat and not to forget that otherwise they will win. So in a way terms are misused but perhaps terms are gaining new meaning. I don't even win a lot of time. Even if I'm way behind, it can be fun because I can still make a dent in the game. I can prevent others from winning. I can help others to win. I can be a king maker.
Fun.
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| I was listening to AM radio this morning and heard a conversation with Bruce Bowen speaking about the Allen Iverson situation. Iverson, Bowen said, was a superstar that was used to scoring more than 20 and even 30 pts per game. Iverson was used to being in the lead, the main scorer on a team. So going on another team where his role has changed made him conform to a role that he was unaccustomed to performing. He said, "he's an older guy. He's having a hard time changing. He's saying he doesn't want to change." It's not like I see this as surprising but more as disappointing. It's another one of those "Iverson being Iverson's." He's never been team-friendly. Although the meltdown in Detroit may not have been his fault, it seems like he's been a cancer. He doesn't bring the right attitude. He doesn't like practice for instance. He thinks it's useless. That would definitely cause a team to be less than prepared for a game. I see this type of attitude all the time in pro sports. I can relate to it.
So that led me to start thinking about how hard it is for people to conform. I was reminded of these verses: 43"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' 44But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:43-48).
These verses were so hard for me to accept. As I read them, I understood what they said, but I did not necessarily adhere to them as quickly. But I needed to accept them. The two most important commands are "Love your God with all your mind, body, heart, and soul" and "Love your Neighbor as you love yourself." Love is the binding force that brings people together. God wants to bring people together, not to separate them. That's why when we were his enemies, he still loved us. (Romans 5:8).
Knowing this brings responsibility to applying it. Some can know about this and refuse to conform. They're too old, they're too used to how things are, or they're too used to their roles. Even though I still have qualms about applying it, the more and more I practice it, the easier it becomes, but I have to be conscious about it. I have to be alert. Wake up. Stay up.
I think what helps me to remember this is the forgiveness that God has given me in spite of the things I have done to hurt Him. As much as He's forgiven me, I should forgive others, and even more so. This coming from someone who's been confined for assault. So it doesn't come natural. It's hard. Sometimes, I just want to let out my frustration on others. Tear others down. But God doesn't want that. But others do it, I start to think. Others tear me down all the time. Others criticize me for the sake of doing so, trying to make themselves look good or for other reasons, not really caring if their criticism really helps me or more likely harms me. Others don't treat me the way I want to be treated. The thought would pervade my mind, "But they don't respect me." But it's not about how I treat them. I start to see that it's not about me. It's about them. Love them. Why am I so self-centered? Why do I only think about me? Why don't I start thinking about how I treat them? Maybe that's why they're treating me that way, but even if it's not, I still shouldn't treat them in a way that I wouldn't want to be treated. No matter what, even if others are being jerks, I shouldn't return the favor. Love them. Sometimes, others take advantage of me. I begin to think, "Let them." I'm blessed enough that they would want something from me. Love them.
After reading this post, it reaffirms that I am an N.
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| Sent in my application today! The hardest part is actually completing it. The next hardest part: the wait. I've been kind of awol the past weekend so it's good to have this weight lifted. I even skipped playing Settlers of Catan, and you know how much I like that game.
Other applications to come soon though. Can't rest for long. Just a breather.
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| I think words were meant to be more than just mere words. I hear hi's, goodbye's, thank you's, how are you's, you're welcome's, and other words all the time. Is it what was really meant or were they said just because of formality? It's hard to read in to it, and maybe it shouldn't really be done at all. Of course, words can be piercing so perhaps these mere formalities were meant to help. But wouldn't it be nice if the words were the same as the intention and the meaning behind them instead of contradictions? One more thing to accept.
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